Saturday, 22 October 2016
Monday, 18 July 2016
Top 10 Dating Tips
Whether you are new to the dating scene, are reentering the dating scene, or are a serial dater, you can use dating tips and advice. No one is a dating expert – even the most beautiful and wealthy people all struggle with matters of the heart. Everyone can learn something about how to date more, how to attract the types of people we want to attract, and how to make sure initial chemistry blooms into an enduring relationship.
The truth is, there are no magic formulas, no fail-proof tricks, no cunning ways of trapping Mr. or Miss Right. There are however some essential facts that you should always bear in mind along the way. Dating tips are just that -- tips, not one-size-fits-all guarantees. Different tacks will work for different people. It depends on the situation, who we are, where we are in our lives, etc. However, there are some threads of advice that are fairly universal and can benefit anyone who practices them:
Top 10 Dating Tips
1.Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, be ready to commit to dating. Half-heartedness won't work. In fact, it won’t even get you half-way. If you really want to date, put some effort into it. Do some research and think about what you want out of dating. Prepare yourself for the inevitable rejection we all face at some point in dating and commit not to give up.
2.Get your act together. Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a diet. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself, and others can sense that.
3.Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look. Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't try to be someone you’re not, but amplify and accentuate your positives. Throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. Your date will appreciate that you demonstrated some effort.
4.Think about what you want to gain from dating and what timeframes you expect. Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do, then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.
5.Surround yourself with people who will support your dating aims. By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Don’t sabotage this by sitting around with friends who are negative about love and relationships (often the married ones). Start attending social functions frequented by singles. Sitting alongside couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.
6.Choose those you have a good chance of dating. Be realistic. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous, great! Just know that others will expect you to be the same.
7.Join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups -- anything that might help you meet like-minded potential partners. You will not meet people by staying indoors and playing video games – many have tried and failed at this approach.
8.Take time off from dating occasionally if it’s not going well or causing dating fatigue. Recharging your batteries and keeping confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. We all hit rough patches, but don’t let your search for love become a death march. Date in phases if necessary.
9.Enjoy dating for what it is, dating. It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not play a bigger part in your life down the road. The fact is, most people have something interesting to offer. While you may not be out on the dating scene looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.
10.Never make yourself too available. People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. As part of keeping up the mystery, do not sleep with your dates early on. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. (And yes, this goes for both men AND women!) If the chemistry peaks too early, your emotions may never have time to catch up and the relationship will eventually wither away.
1.Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, be ready to commit to dating. Half-heartedness won't work. In fact, it won’t even get you half-way. If you really want to date, put some effort into it. Do some research and think about what you want out of dating. Prepare yourself for the inevitable rejection we all face at some point in dating and commit not to give up.
2.Get your act together. Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a diet. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself, and others can sense that.
3.Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look. Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't try to be someone you’re not, but amplify and accentuate your positives. Throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. Your date will appreciate that you demonstrated some effort.
4.Think about what you want to gain from dating and what timeframes you expect. Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do, then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.
5.Surround yourself with people who will support your dating aims. By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Don’t sabotage this by sitting around with friends who are negative about love and relationships (often the married ones). Start attending social functions frequented by singles. Sitting alongside couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.
6.Choose those you have a good chance of dating. Be realistic. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous, great! Just know that others will expect you to be the same.
7.Join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups -- anything that might help you meet like-minded potential partners. You will not meet people by staying indoors and playing video games – many have tried and failed at this approach.
8.Take time off from dating occasionally if it’s not going well or causing dating fatigue. Recharging your batteries and keeping confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. We all hit rough patches, but don’t let your search for love become a death march. Date in phases if necessary.
9.Enjoy dating for what it is, dating. It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not play a bigger part in your life down the road. The fact is, most people have something interesting to offer. While you may not be out on the dating scene looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.
10.Never make yourself too available. People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. As part of keeping up the mystery, do not sleep with your dates early on. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. (And yes, this goes for both men AND women!) If the chemistry peaks too early, your emotions may never have time to catch up and the relationship will eventually wither away.
Wednesday, 4 November 2015
The Benefits of a Wood-Burning Grill
According to health experts, grilling foods over an open fire is one of the healthiest cooking methods. Grilling also imparts smokiness to meats, fish and vegetables, improving the flavor safely. And let’s face it, grilling is a must especially when you have friends over!
Operating a grill isn’t taxing nor complex. As long as you have a fire going, then you can start grilling. An outdoor wood-burning grill is a worthy investment especially if you love hosting parties or dinners with friends and loved ones. In today’s post, we are listing down reasons why you should consider getting a wood-burning grill:
Juicy, Flavorful Food
Meats, fish and vegetables cooked over a burning wood just taste better than unhealthy frying. A wood-burning grill doesn’t just add smokiness to the food, it also enhances the natural flavors. The steady heat cooks the meat and poultry to perfection without burning. The result? Scrumptious, juicy grilled meats and perfectly cooked fish and vegetables.
You can even use different types of wood for burning to achieve a certain flavor. Expert grillers swear by almond or apple wood when cooking steaks. Almond and apple wood adds nuttiness to the meat. Maple and hickory complements all types of meats, imparting a strong aroma and richer flavor.
Zero Chemicals
You don’t have to add various seasonings or other food additives to whip up an amazing feast. All you need is a wood-burning grill and a dash of salt and pepper! Minimal seasoning means healthier foods. If you’re watching your sodium intake, you can experiment with different herbs, spices and fruit extracts to flavor meats, fish and poultry for grilling!
Boosts Nutrient Content
Did you know that grilling helps boost the food’s nutrient content? For instance, grilled vegetables contain more nutrients than boiled or sautéed vegetables. Meats retain more riboflavin and thiamine when grilled than fried or broiled. Because the cooking time is relatively short, grilled foods aren’t just flavor, they are also more nutrient-dense.
Less Fat
Grilled foods are less fatty as opposed to fried, broiled or boiled foods. The high heat cooks the meat to perfection, allowing fat to drip down so it doesn’t end up on your food. You can keep grilled foods even healthier by not using ghee, butter or vegetable oil.
Safer, Cleaner Foods
Grilling helps eliminate microbes that may otherwise cause sickness such as E.coli or salmonella. The same high heat that renders the meat juicy and tender inside and out also incinerates germs that may be present on or in the meat. When the food is cooked, you’re sure that it’s not only delicious but also clean too!
Fun, Rewarding Experience
Wood burning grill is often a mainstay in outdoor parties, special dinners and even holidays. Wouldn’t it be great to bond over sumptuous food while watching a game or hosting a special event with friends?
Generally, using wood-burning grill is a great way to touch base with friends, serve good food and have fun. The entire experience is not only rewarding, it will help create priceless memories too!
Operating a grill isn’t taxing nor complex. As long as you have a fire going, then you can start grilling. An outdoor wood-burning grill is a worthy investment especially if you love hosting parties or dinners with friends and loved ones. In today’s post, we are listing down reasons why you should consider getting a wood-burning grill:
Juicy, Flavorful Food
Meats, fish and vegetables cooked over a burning wood just taste better than unhealthy frying. A wood-burning grill doesn’t just add smokiness to the food, it also enhances the natural flavors. The steady heat cooks the meat and poultry to perfection without burning. The result? Scrumptious, juicy grilled meats and perfectly cooked fish and vegetables.
You can even use different types of wood for burning to achieve a certain flavor. Expert grillers swear by almond or apple wood when cooking steaks. Almond and apple wood adds nuttiness to the meat. Maple and hickory complements all types of meats, imparting a strong aroma and richer flavor.
Zero Chemicals
You don’t have to add various seasonings or other food additives to whip up an amazing feast. All you need is a wood-burning grill and a dash of salt and pepper! Minimal seasoning means healthier foods. If you’re watching your sodium intake, you can experiment with different herbs, spices and fruit extracts to flavor meats, fish and poultry for grilling!
Boosts Nutrient Content
Did you know that grilling helps boost the food’s nutrient content? For instance, grilled vegetables contain more nutrients than boiled or sautéed vegetables. Meats retain more riboflavin and thiamine when grilled than fried or broiled. Because the cooking time is relatively short, grilled foods aren’t just flavor, they are also more nutrient-dense.
Less Fat
Grilled foods are less fatty as opposed to fried, broiled or boiled foods. The high heat cooks the meat to perfection, allowing fat to drip down so it doesn’t end up on your food. You can keep grilled foods even healthier by not using ghee, butter or vegetable oil.
Safer, Cleaner Foods
Grilling helps eliminate microbes that may otherwise cause sickness such as E.coli or salmonella. The same high heat that renders the meat juicy and tender inside and out also incinerates germs that may be present on or in the meat. When the food is cooked, you’re sure that it’s not only delicious but also clean too!
Fun, Rewarding Experience
Wood burning grill is often a mainstay in outdoor parties, special dinners and even holidays. Wouldn’t it be great to bond over sumptuous food while watching a game or hosting a special event with friends?
Generally, using wood-burning grill is a great way to touch base with friends, serve good food and have fun. The entire experience is not only rewarding, it will help create priceless memories too!
Tuesday, 3 November 2015
More Sex Doesn’t Lead To Increased Happiness
Countless research and self-help books claim that having more sex will lead to increased happiness, based on the common finding that those having more sex are also happier. However, there are many reasons why one might observe this positive relationship between sex and happiness. Being happy in the first place, for example, might lead someone to have more sex (what researchers call ‘reverse causality’), or being healthy might result in being both happier and having more sex.
In the first study to examine the causal connection between sexual frequency and happiness, Carnegie Mellon University researchers experimentally assigned some couples to have more sex than others, and observed both group’s happiness over a three month period. In a paper published in the Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization, they report that simply having more sex did not make couples happier, in part because the increased frequency led to a decline in wanting for and enjoyment of sex.
One hundred and twenty eight healthy individuals between the ages of 35-65 who were in married male-female couples participated in the research. The researchers randomly assigned the couples to one of two groups. The first group received no instructions on sexual frequency. The second group was asked to double their weekly sexual intercourse frequency.
Each member of the participating couples completed three different types of surveys. At the beginning of the study, they answered questions to establish baselines. Daily during the experimental period, the participants answered questions online to measure health behaviors, happiness levels and the occurrence, type and enjoyableness of sex. The exit survey analyzed whether baseline levels changed over the three-month period.
The couples instructed to increase sexual frequency did have more sex. However, it did not lead to increased, but instead to a small decrease, in happiness. Looking further, the researchers found that couples instructed to have more sex reported lower sexual desire and a decrease in sexual enjoyment. It wasn’t that actually having more sex led to decreased wanting and liking for sex. Instead, it seemed to be just the fact that they were asked to do it, rather than initiating on their own.
“Perhaps couples changed the story they told themselves about why they were having sex, from an activity voluntarily engaged in to one that was part of a research study. If we ran the study again, and could afford to do it, we would try to encourage subjects into initiating more sex in ways that put them in a sexy frame of mind, perhaps with baby-sitting, hotel rooms or Egyptian sheets, rather than directing them to do so,” said George Loewenstein, the study’s lead investigator and the Herbert A. Simon University Professor of Economics and Psychology in the Dietrich College of Humanities and Social Sciences.
Despite the study’s results, Loewenstein continues to believe that most couples have too little sex for their own good, and thinks that increasing sexual frequency in the right ways can be beneficial.
One of the study’s designers, Tamar Krishnamurti, suggested that the study’s findings may actually help couples to improve their sex lives and their happiness.
“The desire to have sex decreases much more quickly than the enjoyment of sex once it’s been initiated. Instead of focusing on increasing sexual frequency to the levels they experienced at the beginning of a relationship, couples may want to work on creating an environment that sparks their desire and makes the sex that they do have even more fun,” said Krishnamurti, a research scientist in CMU’s Department of Engineering and Public Policy.
—
Carnegie Mellon University
In the first study to examine the causal connection between sexual frequency and happiness, Carnegie Mellon University researchers experimentally assigned some couples to have more sex than others, and observed both group’s happiness over a three month period. In a paper published in the Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization, they report that simply having more sex did not make couples happier, in part because the increased frequency led to a decline in wanting for and enjoyment of sex.
One hundred and twenty eight healthy individuals between the ages of 35-65 who were in married male-female couples participated in the research. The researchers randomly assigned the couples to one of two groups. The first group received no instructions on sexual frequency. The second group was asked to double their weekly sexual intercourse frequency.
Each member of the participating couples completed three different types of surveys. At the beginning of the study, they answered questions to establish baselines. Daily during the experimental period, the participants answered questions online to measure health behaviors, happiness levels and the occurrence, type and enjoyableness of sex. The exit survey analyzed whether baseline levels changed over the three-month period.
The couples instructed to increase sexual frequency did have more sex. However, it did not lead to increased, but instead to a small decrease, in happiness. Looking further, the researchers found that couples instructed to have more sex reported lower sexual desire and a decrease in sexual enjoyment. It wasn’t that actually having more sex led to decreased wanting and liking for sex. Instead, it seemed to be just the fact that they were asked to do it, rather than initiating on their own.
“Perhaps couples changed the story they told themselves about why they were having sex, from an activity voluntarily engaged in to one that was part of a research study. If we ran the study again, and could afford to do it, we would try to encourage subjects into initiating more sex in ways that put them in a sexy frame of mind, perhaps with baby-sitting, hotel rooms or Egyptian sheets, rather than directing them to do so,” said George Loewenstein, the study’s lead investigator and the Herbert A. Simon University Professor of Economics and Psychology in the Dietrich College of Humanities and Social Sciences.
Despite the study’s results, Loewenstein continues to believe that most couples have too little sex for their own good, and thinks that increasing sexual frequency in the right ways can be beneficial.
One of the study’s designers, Tamar Krishnamurti, suggested that the study’s findings may actually help couples to improve their sex lives and their happiness.
“The desire to have sex decreases much more quickly than the enjoyment of sex once it’s been initiated. Instead of focusing on increasing sexual frequency to the levels they experienced at the beginning of a relationship, couples may want to work on creating an environment that sparks their desire and makes the sex that they do have even more fun,” said Krishnamurti, a research scientist in CMU’s Department of Engineering and Public Policy.
—
Carnegie Mellon University
8 Ways to Enjoy Sun-Ripened Tomatoes
There is no such thing as having too many tomatoes! Red, juicy tomatoes make a great addition to pasta dishes, savory meals, and sauces. Wondering what to do with your sun-ripened tomatoes? Encourage the whole family to eat healthy by whipping up these delectable gastronomic creations:
1. Grill Them
Although tomatoes are traditionally eaten fresh or stewed, you can pop tomato slices on the grill. We recommend marinating the tomatoes for a few minutes in olive oil and fresh basil before charring it slightly over the grill. You can serve grilled tomatoes with melted cheese as a summer appetizer or on the side for grilled meats and poultry!
2. Salsa from Scratch
What’s a classic salsa without juicy, ripe tomatoes? Make your very own chunky salsa from scratch using leftover tomatoes. Just dice the tomatoes up together with onion, jalapeno peppers, and cilantro. Add a dash of lime juice and season with salt and pepper. You can serve the salsa as a side dish, as a dip or as stuffing to meats and seafood!
3. Homemade Spaghetti Sauce
Do away with store-bought spaghetti sauce. Store-bought sauces are loaded with sodium and preservatives. Instead of feeding your family with junk, why not make good use of those leftover tomatoes for a homemade spaghetti sauce? It’s surprisingly easy to make.
Just blanch fresh tomatoes in boiling water then give them an ice bath to remove the skin. Then, roast the skinned tomatoes. Finally simmer the roasted tomatoes in a pot of water and add fresh basil, minced garlic, oregano, and wine. Season with salt and pepper and you are done.
4.Make Appetizers
Here’s a quick appetizer you can try using fresh tomatoes. Slice the tomatoes thickly and soak it in balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Add crumbled feta cheese, blue cheese, Mozzarella or any cheese that strikes your fancy. Serve this and enjoy the explosion of flavors in your mouth!
5. Whip Up a Tomato Fruit Cocktail
Tomato is a fruit, but you rarely see it being added in fruit salads. Why not give your regular fruit salad recipe an upgrade by adding sweet summer tomatoes? Just pop halved cherry tomatoes to your fruit salad mix. The tartness of the tomatoes will cut through the sweetness of the summer fruits.
6. Stuffed Tomatoes
If you have large, beautiful tomatoes, you can stuff it with chopped olives, artichokes, feta cheese and seasoned rice for a delightful meal! You can also try filling it with sausage, peppers, and bread crumbs. Just hollow out the tomatoes and remove the seeds. Now fill it with your choice of filling then broil the stuffed tomatoes. Serve it piping hot and enjoy!
7. Tomato Chips
If you’re watching what you eat then you can convert tomatoes into a healthy snack. Slice several tomatoes and sprinkle with salt and basil. Pop the tomatoes in a dehydrator and dry the vegetable for 8 to 12 hours. You can use the chips as a snack, as ingredients for stews or add in salads.
8.Freeze Them
Preserve your leftover tomatoes by blanching them and then giving the tomatoes an ice bath to remove the skin. Remove the seeds and keep the sliced tomatoes in a Ziploc bag. Stick the baggies in the fridge. Now you have a stock of fresh summer tomatoes you can use to make soups and stews during the fall and winter season!
1. Grill Them
Although tomatoes are traditionally eaten fresh or stewed, you can pop tomato slices on the grill. We recommend marinating the tomatoes for a few minutes in olive oil and fresh basil before charring it slightly over the grill. You can serve grilled tomatoes with melted cheese as a summer appetizer or on the side for grilled meats and poultry!
2. Salsa from Scratch
What’s a classic salsa without juicy, ripe tomatoes? Make your very own chunky salsa from scratch using leftover tomatoes. Just dice the tomatoes up together with onion, jalapeno peppers, and cilantro. Add a dash of lime juice and season with salt and pepper. You can serve the salsa as a side dish, as a dip or as stuffing to meats and seafood!
3. Homemade Spaghetti Sauce
Do away with store-bought spaghetti sauce. Store-bought sauces are loaded with sodium and preservatives. Instead of feeding your family with junk, why not make good use of those leftover tomatoes for a homemade spaghetti sauce? It’s surprisingly easy to make.
Just blanch fresh tomatoes in boiling water then give them an ice bath to remove the skin. Then, roast the skinned tomatoes. Finally simmer the roasted tomatoes in a pot of water and add fresh basil, minced garlic, oregano, and wine. Season with salt and pepper and you are done.
4.Make Appetizers
Here’s a quick appetizer you can try using fresh tomatoes. Slice the tomatoes thickly and soak it in balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Add crumbled feta cheese, blue cheese, Mozzarella or any cheese that strikes your fancy. Serve this and enjoy the explosion of flavors in your mouth!
5. Whip Up a Tomato Fruit Cocktail
Tomato is a fruit, but you rarely see it being added in fruit salads. Why not give your regular fruit salad recipe an upgrade by adding sweet summer tomatoes? Just pop halved cherry tomatoes to your fruit salad mix. The tartness of the tomatoes will cut through the sweetness of the summer fruits.
6. Stuffed Tomatoes
If you have large, beautiful tomatoes, you can stuff it with chopped olives, artichokes, feta cheese and seasoned rice for a delightful meal! You can also try filling it with sausage, peppers, and bread crumbs. Just hollow out the tomatoes and remove the seeds. Now fill it with your choice of filling then broil the stuffed tomatoes. Serve it piping hot and enjoy!
7. Tomato Chips
If you’re watching what you eat then you can convert tomatoes into a healthy snack. Slice several tomatoes and sprinkle with salt and basil. Pop the tomatoes in a dehydrator and dry the vegetable for 8 to 12 hours. You can use the chips as a snack, as ingredients for stews or add in salads.
8.Freeze Them
Preserve your leftover tomatoes by blanching them and then giving the tomatoes an ice bath to remove the skin. Remove the seeds and keep the sliced tomatoes in a Ziploc bag. Stick the baggies in the fridge. Now you have a stock of fresh summer tomatoes you can use to make soups and stews during the fall and winter season!
5 Tricks To Learn Any Language Without Going To Class
Nowadays you can adapt and personalize the way you learn more than ever before, depending upon preferences, motivations and time.
Do you remember the point in your school life when you decided which career path you would follow? Was there a moment when your mental magnesium burst into a searing white flame of clarity and you determined to become a chemist, or when you first calculated thirty-four multiplied by twenty-one quicker than the teacher and decided to paint your world in numbers?
One of the imperatives of any teacher is to communicate the purpose of learning; the present and future utility of the information taught. I knew very early on that I wanted to be a world-famous sportsman. I derived so much joy from simply accelerating into big open spaces that no teacher had to convince me of the utility of it. I approached other subjects with a much greater degree of scepticism; why read Shakespeare? Why figure out the length of the longest side of this triangle? Why learn French when they all speak English anyway?
I remember vividly how my French teacher would stand at the front of the class with twenty boards that he would repeatedly shuffle and display. Every week he would show the same boards and we would garble the same sentences. In hindsight, it was most probably a method of crowd control to deliver students into a trance-like state of compliance, but it still despairs me that one of the displayed sentences was Je gagne au loto (I win the lottery), taught in isolation and virtually impossible to use in the present tense.
In an article published in the Guardian, young learners were asked what motivated them to study languages. Interestingly, only a small number considered school a fundamental drive behind their language learning. Exchanges in foreign countries, conversations with native speakers, watching foreign films and new methods of learning via online games and mobile apps proved much more significant.
Since leaving school I’ve learned three languages, two of which I’ve learned to a high degree of fluency. I’m by no means a natural, and certainly not a polyglot. Here are a few tricks on how to learn once you’ve escaped from the confines of your school walls.
1. Throw yourself in at the deep end
Many people will look you in the eye and tell you with utter conviction that the only way to learn is to move to the country of your target language. This isn’t strictly true, but it obviously makes immersion more likely. You still have to seek out opportunities for the lengthy and laborious conversations that really affect the rate at which you progress. Define your new environment early on and in the language you want to learn (don’t forget your original imperatives and slip nonchalantly into groups of fellow countrymen). When I moved to Spain I purposefully moved in with two Madrileños and played weekly games of football and basketball with natives. Speaking is easy when you’re in the mood and you have a beer in your hand, but it’s much more taxing when you’re expelling words between pants after a madcap game of baloncesto. Order your thoughts in these moments, however, and your thoughts will order themselves in less demanding situations.
2. Speaking with natives for one hour is more useful than studying for weeks at school
When you’re just starting out, equip yourself with questions. As you stumble through your first exchanges, you may sometimes perceive yourself as an eye-rollingly tedious conversation partner. Remember that people love to talk about themselves. Expand the range of questions you ask when you meet people and prepare your own answers. If your counterpart is vaguely practiced in the art of conversation, your questions will be duly returned. It is through these exchanges that you will begin to mimic your counterparts, develop and judge register, and even construct a personality in your new language. This bizarre process of personality building is fascinating and infuses the whole experience with an emotional salience that will continue to drive you forward.
3. Blur the lines between your free time and your learning time
There’s a great Eddie Izzard sketch where he pokes fun at the morose inactivity of British film when compared with the bombastic sensationalism of Hollywood. Different countries tell stories differently, and they often have a whole cast of acting royalty that is barely known beyond their borders. At the age of 18, I never would have thought that some of my favourite films 10 years down the line would be in Spanish, German, Portuguese or Italian. I didn’t think a German sentence would move me to tears, or a single scene in a Mexican film would jolt me into the immediate purchase of a ticket to la ciudad. Y Tu Mamá También, El Mar Adentro, Cidade de Deus, Hin und Weg, Biutiful, Le Conseguenze Dell’Amore, Im Juli (and anything else with Moritz Bleibtreu… ) are all films from which I gained so much by watching them in their original, unadulterated versions. And that’s just film. Try listening to Freiheit by Marius Müller-Westernhagen – and to how the crowd reacts to this gawky, poetic homage to freedom itself – and you may struggle to repress a saccharine emotional rush.
4. Travel as much as you possibly can
If you travel, you will enjoy the enormous utility of languages first-hand. Your languages will facilitate your movements, ensure a richer diversity of more authentic experiences, and may well even reduce the cost of your trip. I never really returned to French after school, but in the summer of 2014 I took a train from Berlin to Madrid, stopping off at various points along the way. Between Freiburg and Dijón I hurried through a course all about hotel vocabulary on my phone. When I arrived I asked the cantankerous receptionist tentatively;
“Vous parlez anglais, allemand ou espagnol ?” - Do you speak English, German or Spanish?
I thought the assertion implicit within this question that I was not a stubborn monolingual would placate him, but his reply came venom-lined;
“Non, seulement français.” - No, only French.
“J’ai réservé une chambre pour ce soir. Mon nom est Wood.” - I reserved a room for this evening. My name is Wood.
It wasn’t perfect, but it sufficed, and he perked up enough so as not to eject me from the establishment. I disappeared into my room and proceeded to do the next few courses on how to order food, and then I ventured out into the city of mustard.
5. Take control of your own class
How would you like to learn? How do you think you learn best? Do you know the answers to these questions? Have you ever asked yourself these questions? Remember that the most important question is how you like to learn, not how you learn best. If you enjoy the learning process, you’ll stick to it, and even if it takes a little longer, who cares? You’re enjoying it, after all. So relocate your class to a park, listen to music in your new language while walking to work, or best of all, meet up with a friend who’s a native speaker or also learning, and immerse yourself in the simple pleasures of coffee and conversation, just like the protagonists of our video.
Do you remember the point in your school life when you decided which career path you would follow? Was there a moment when your mental magnesium burst into a searing white flame of clarity and you determined to become a chemist, or when you first calculated thirty-four multiplied by twenty-one quicker than the teacher and decided to paint your world in numbers?
One of the imperatives of any teacher is to communicate the purpose of learning; the present and future utility of the information taught. I knew very early on that I wanted to be a world-famous sportsman. I derived so much joy from simply accelerating into big open spaces that no teacher had to convince me of the utility of it. I approached other subjects with a much greater degree of scepticism; why read Shakespeare? Why figure out the length of the longest side of this triangle? Why learn French when they all speak English anyway?
I remember vividly how my French teacher would stand at the front of the class with twenty boards that he would repeatedly shuffle and display. Every week he would show the same boards and we would garble the same sentences. In hindsight, it was most probably a method of crowd control to deliver students into a trance-like state of compliance, but it still despairs me that one of the displayed sentences was Je gagne au loto (I win the lottery), taught in isolation and virtually impossible to use in the present tense.
In an article published in the Guardian, young learners were asked what motivated them to study languages. Interestingly, only a small number considered school a fundamental drive behind their language learning. Exchanges in foreign countries, conversations with native speakers, watching foreign films and new methods of learning via online games and mobile apps proved much more significant.
Since leaving school I’ve learned three languages, two of which I’ve learned to a high degree of fluency. I’m by no means a natural, and certainly not a polyglot. Here are a few tricks on how to learn once you’ve escaped from the confines of your school walls.
1. Throw yourself in at the deep end
Many people will look you in the eye and tell you with utter conviction that the only way to learn is to move to the country of your target language. This isn’t strictly true, but it obviously makes immersion more likely. You still have to seek out opportunities for the lengthy and laborious conversations that really affect the rate at which you progress. Define your new environment early on and in the language you want to learn (don’t forget your original imperatives and slip nonchalantly into groups of fellow countrymen). When I moved to Spain I purposefully moved in with two Madrileños and played weekly games of football and basketball with natives. Speaking is easy when you’re in the mood and you have a beer in your hand, but it’s much more taxing when you’re expelling words between pants after a madcap game of baloncesto. Order your thoughts in these moments, however, and your thoughts will order themselves in less demanding situations.
2. Speaking with natives for one hour is more useful than studying for weeks at school
When you’re just starting out, equip yourself with questions. As you stumble through your first exchanges, you may sometimes perceive yourself as an eye-rollingly tedious conversation partner. Remember that people love to talk about themselves. Expand the range of questions you ask when you meet people and prepare your own answers. If your counterpart is vaguely practiced in the art of conversation, your questions will be duly returned. It is through these exchanges that you will begin to mimic your counterparts, develop and judge register, and even construct a personality in your new language. This bizarre process of personality building is fascinating and infuses the whole experience with an emotional salience that will continue to drive you forward.
3. Blur the lines between your free time and your learning time
There’s a great Eddie Izzard sketch where he pokes fun at the morose inactivity of British film when compared with the bombastic sensationalism of Hollywood. Different countries tell stories differently, and they often have a whole cast of acting royalty that is barely known beyond their borders. At the age of 18, I never would have thought that some of my favourite films 10 years down the line would be in Spanish, German, Portuguese or Italian. I didn’t think a German sentence would move me to tears, or a single scene in a Mexican film would jolt me into the immediate purchase of a ticket to la ciudad. Y Tu Mamá También, El Mar Adentro, Cidade de Deus, Hin und Weg, Biutiful, Le Conseguenze Dell’Amore, Im Juli (and anything else with Moritz Bleibtreu… ) are all films from which I gained so much by watching them in their original, unadulterated versions. And that’s just film. Try listening to Freiheit by Marius Müller-Westernhagen – and to how the crowd reacts to this gawky, poetic homage to freedom itself – and you may struggle to repress a saccharine emotional rush.
4. Travel as much as you possibly can
If you travel, you will enjoy the enormous utility of languages first-hand. Your languages will facilitate your movements, ensure a richer diversity of more authentic experiences, and may well even reduce the cost of your trip. I never really returned to French after school, but in the summer of 2014 I took a train from Berlin to Madrid, stopping off at various points along the way. Between Freiburg and Dijón I hurried through a course all about hotel vocabulary on my phone. When I arrived I asked the cantankerous receptionist tentatively;
“Vous parlez anglais, allemand ou espagnol ?” - Do you speak English, German or Spanish?
I thought the assertion implicit within this question that I was not a stubborn monolingual would placate him, but his reply came venom-lined;
“Non, seulement français.” - No, only French.
“J’ai réservé une chambre pour ce soir. Mon nom est Wood.” - I reserved a room for this evening. My name is Wood.
It wasn’t perfect, but it sufficed, and he perked up enough so as not to eject me from the establishment. I disappeared into my room and proceeded to do the next few courses on how to order food, and then I ventured out into the city of mustard.
5. Take control of your own class
How would you like to learn? How do you think you learn best? Do you know the answers to these questions? Have you ever asked yourself these questions? Remember that the most important question is how you like to learn, not how you learn best. If you enjoy the learning process, you’ll stick to it, and even if it takes a little longer, who cares? You’re enjoying it, after all. So relocate your class to a park, listen to music in your new language while walking to work, or best of all, meet up with a friend who’s a native speaker or also learning, and immerse yourself in the simple pleasures of coffee and conversation, just like the protagonists of our video.
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